The Chances We Get Are Limitless

For the past two years, there have been a lot of times wherein I've literally lost myself to the hardships and challenges that life has given me. I've rerouted a couple of times. I've left a lot of people along the way. I've stopped over at unnecessary destinations. I've become so conscious of where I'm going despite that other people are going on high speed ahead of me. But it all comes down to how I've handled all of those as I went my way. I realized that wherever I went, even though it's not necessarily how I planned it, I still ended up going forward. I still ended up getting one step ahead, no matter if other people get even further than I have. We all start in different chapters of our lives, after all. It's how we still keep moving ahead that matters.

Setbacks haven't set me up backwards at all. They all became setups for me to have my comeback each and every time. And it's in this that I've learned that life is so good to me. God Himself is so good to me that I haven't really acknowledged it until everything had finally fallen into place.

I always thought I'd be hitting rock bottom as the days went by because I refused to have any attachments or help from the people around me. But it turns out, the people that I keep refusing and rejecting are the people that have also lifted me up along the way. It's so amazing how they were still able to tolerate me when I myself couldn't tolerate either them or me. It's a definite phase that I will never forget because learning that you need people has made me exposed to the growth that I needed. I'm not on my own. I'm not as alone as I think I am. Other people in my life are not the enemy here. I was my own enemy. And I've finally learned how to defeat myself.

There came a time wherein I couldn't forgive myself for all the regrets I keep regretting because I didn't take up the chances that were laid down right in front of me. I couldn't accept the fact that the choices I made that still led me somewhere didn't satisfy me at the time. I was so frustrated at myself at having a hard time to gain confidence in coming back to the things I loved to do that I almost gave up and told myself that I don't deserve the chances I'm being given. I don't deserve what's right in front of me if I can't grasp it enough to hold onto and keep. But after all of that has been set aside, it's actually just me saying that to myself to stop trying.

Once I finally got rid of my negative thoughts, I just went for everything in my way and did it. I was able to get back on track. I was able to build myself up to become stronger than I ever was before. I used the success of other people as my inspiration instead of my competition. We're all running towards separate fields and the wider our horizons get, the bigger the chances we can take.

They say that the chances we are to choose in life are the things that limit us but in the two years that's passed of my life in senior high school, the chances we get are limitless. Your first chances might not be the same as your second chances or third or forth or even fifth but these are still the chances that you can take. These are the options set for you to choose. And I'm glad the two years taught me that.

With that, I shall copy and paste my "graduation message" from my Facebook profile:

"It's time to stop hiding behind a mask.
 (Expect a tl;dr post ahead)


This is your future scriptwriter/lyricist/director/New York Times' Best-selling author/Tony Award winner on her way to success (Kath Steele: "Today, we take over Broadway… and then, THE WORLD!"). I dare to dream all of these because I know I have God who will lead the way. I also know that my family and friends have been in full-on support mode with all the decisions I've made and will continue making (even though some of them have been out-of-my-mind or unbelievably unachievable–What's a dream without the challenge in achieving it, right?).


Throughout my stay in UST as a senior high student, I admit I've been lost in my way countless times and quitting had been a definite option. But being reminded of why I want to fight and conquer the battles given to me have moved me to keep on venturing the vast world right in front of me. Some have been ungrateful for the added two years but for me, it's been the two years that have cultivated me and nearly killed me, giving me a chance to be brought back to life as a new person. It's been a tight journey. But it was a journey that made my decision to move forward even clearer. I finally know what I want. I just need some building up to get there. And I may not have received any honors or distinction or any gold medals but that doesn't make it any less of a chance that I'll reach my dreams–


–"Not everything that counts is counted and not everything that's counted truly counts."
 -Jay Shetty


As the line from The Climb by Miley Cyrus states, "It ain't about how fast I get there, it ain't about what's waiting on the other side–It's the climb," I will never question if I end up to where I want to be or not, so long as I've enjoyed my travel along the way. If it's meant for me, it will be. God has written it better than I did so I leave my life story to Him. If I've gone this far with His plans, I know I'll grow even further continuing to let Him lead.






6.15.18
 // 2016093223 //
Calayag, Pauline Eingel Nicole Santos
 University of Santo Tomas
 Music, Arts and Design Strand"

College will definitely be a new beginning for all of us.
I just hope that, this time, I won't lose my way anymore.
I just want to keep track of the good things to treasure and learn from the bad things coming my way.




Look out world!




Here I come!








xoxo